she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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