that's an acceptable place to lick
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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