So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
