Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
