Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Randomize