I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize