i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
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