tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Randomize