I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
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