I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
