I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Can you bring me the toilet please
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Randomize
