I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Randomize
