Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
