We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
