Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
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