We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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