Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i would punch a child for taco bell
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
