You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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