Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
