his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
