Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
