We won't sleep together?
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
