Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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