im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
