Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
