Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
