oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
