she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
