I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Randomize
