i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
