I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
