he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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