I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
