He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize