someone owes me an orgasm
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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