Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Randomize