actually, I'm a sock model
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
