cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
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