So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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