i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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