normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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