Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
