Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize