they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
