Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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