dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
i dont even know how to be here
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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