True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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