How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
