I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
