new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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