Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
